He's The Reason You Cant Orgasm!

Today, we are exploring why emotional mastery is crucial for unlocking the sex life of your dreams and ending your confusing, embarrassing sexual experiences.

Nothing is wrong with your pussy; she just doesn't feel safe enough to come out and play!

One of the biggest concerns for women who have experienced family sexual abuse or incest is the fear of becoming a victim of abuse again. This vulnerability can lead to misdirected harm, making it crucial to find ways to protect yourself from further trauma.

The key to avoiding additional harm is emotional mastery. By developing emotional mastery, you can identify potential threats before allowing them into your life. You'll learn to take ownership of your sexual experiences and create the physical intimacy you desire while safeguarding yourself from anything undesirable. Ultimately, this approach will empower you and promote your well-being.

How the feeling of Comfort is killing your true sexual desires:

Comfort is a feeling you crave especially when comfort was stolen from you and when comfort is coupled with the remnants of abuse in your system, it creates an unconscious mixture that can lead to you becoming the subject of abuse but only this time the abuse will be with someone who you've already given access to your body. Someone who you're already knee-deep in the "love" game with.

Because you have experienced family sexual abuse/incest you often correlate and link sexual danger to specific behaviors and ways in which you were initially violated. Your danger radar becomes hyper-focused to look out for 1st base and while you guard 1st base with all your efforts unbeknown to you 3rd base is being robbed in broad daylight.

So how do you become sexually violated after you promised yourself it would not happen again?

You experience violation again, but this time it is not perpetrated by the typical offender. Instead, this perpetrator used a hidden path that you were unaware of. The path I am referring to is COMFORT. But how can a feeling as gentle as comfort work against you and lead to sexual violation?

Your system has already absorbed some of the worst types of abuse, and as a result, you may have developed a form of "abuse blindness." This means you might not recognize or perceive sexual abuse unless it is overt and obvious. While you know how to protect yourself from blatant perversion, you might not realize the need to guard against familiarity.

Consider the man you are currently involved with as you read this. Reflect on the man you woke up with today and the one you share your bed with. It's important to explore the possibility that he may be sexually violating you, but because you feel comfortable with him, your judgment may be clouded, and your intuition stifled.

At this point, you may have grown so accustomed to him that you cannot see him as a potential threat, even if he doesn't act with force. It's crucial to recognize discomfort and remain vigilant about your well-being, regardless of your comfort level.

We have been conditioned to understand sexual violation through force but in reality, most sexual violations are committed through characteristics such as deception, coercion, and exploitation under the guise of typical desire and temptation. That moment where you don't want sex, but he pushes up on you excessively, and before you know it, you're having full-blown sex. He knows you well enough to know you don't play hard to get but he ignores your "no's" (verbal/nonverbal) and continues to push up on you to get you in the "mood". Here he's exploiting your natural desire for sex, but you don't see it that way because he's doing it with softness and nothing about it seems forceful. Although you're a bit overwhelmed by his advances soon after your body begins to react to him and your natural desires override the feelings of overwhelm.

Just because you had sex under the pace of lovemaking doesn't mean you weren't violated. Similar to how your desire for comfort gets exploited just because it's something you naturally want.

Why comfort is the roadblock to your sexual pleasure: How the feeling of comfort is killing your true sexual desire

Your perception of danger may be unclear, and your intuition is suppressed, making it difficult for you to advocate for yourself. This affects your body’s ability to feel safe enough to fully experience and enjoy sexual pleasure. As a result, you might feel sexually frustrated, believing that you need more sex. However, it’s not about the quantity; what you’re truly missing is the quality of your experiences.

So how do you reclaim your sexual desire and experience the pleasure you deserve?

1. **Decide to stop taxing your sex life. ** Understand that it is never your responsibility to empathize with someone who's preying on you and taking advantage of your empathy. If you prioritize understanding your predator, you do so at the risk of your well-being.

2. **Write down your deepest desires regarding sexual pleasure. ** Bring these desires to life by acknowledging them. Don’t hold back during this exercise—ask for what you want, and you shall receive. Your body has been confused and unfulfilled for too long, so it’s time for you and your body to be on the same page. Own your sexual desires!

3. **Declare that comfort will no longer be your ceiling. ** As you read this, envision breaking through the ceiling of comfort and ascending toward the true sexual pleasure you seek. Remember that comfort does not equal safety, but safety can coexist with comfort. Grant yourself unlimited grace and forgiveness for any time you have put yourself and your body in turmoil, whether knowingly or unknowingly.

If you’re eager to experience the passionate and fulfilling sexual encounters you’ve always desired, where you can truly feel safe and liberated in your own body, then I invite you to apply for the Dear Diary program. In this transformative journey, you’ll learn to navigate and master your emotions, unlocking a vibrant new chapter in your sex life. With privacy and support, you’ll gain the confidence to explore your intimate desires, leading you to a deeper and more pleasurable sexual experience.

Apply for your free "Empowering Path to Sexual Intimacy" strategy session below to reclaim the true intimacy you deserve.

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